I Feel Neither by Soelag

I feel neither…love nor hate

but I feel a bite on my heart

and some emptiness inside.

It’s an empty you can’t fill.

A gap that doesn’t match up to a piece

A void that cannot exist, even the letters v-o-i-d

Because it is the heart that’s seeing,

It is the heart that pounds

But this heart is not speaking.

Should I falter now? It asks itself.

Is it time to let go of what was thought to

hold so much meaning, of what built the core of any being?

Yet, tell me, who can take a blame

For something you haven’t done.

You can’t be somebody you are not.

You can’t live in anybody else’s

shadow that lived in the past.

It’s not me you are watching

Not me you need…

it’s someone you can’t get over.

Perhaps that can cure what ails you.

Whatever it is…if I can’t be the answer

Then why do I have to stay

When there is no need for me.

Look at what you are doing to me,

Taking the smile out of my world.

Instead of sharing my feelings,

You break.

Where does this lead?

I feel a void and my spirit can’t be lifted up…