I am very sad to leave
but at the same time I think
it's time for me to take on another challenge.
I may not show it much
but I am emotionally and physically drained...
it's a blow
the first time I heard I was epileptic,
it's another
to hear I am bipolar,
and it's such a bomb
to feel that in reality,
I am disabled permanently....
I keep fighting it,
but I slump a hundred times over.
I look at all my medical records,
piled up in front of me, heaps!
I was fooling myself the whole time.
Blow after blow,
I always try to keep my head up,
but someone either pulls it back
or pushes it down.
I am a jokester,
I like to stand up and leap
to test who will break the fall.
Yet, no one.
My sickness when it strikes
can muster a battalion,
but a few remain to stand by me.
Life is a mystery,
the times you trust
are usually the times you shouldn't.
More often, it's better
to put your head in an empty box,
no holes,
you can only see your feet or chest,
and hear yourself breathe.
That way, you know you're still alive.
I am putting myself in one right now...
We'll be here when you come out.
ReplyDeletethat is so good to know.
ReplyDeleteNo one is perfect in this crazy-ass world, cheer up, be a lot more stronger than u think... show them what u got !!!
ReplyDeleteIn my opinion, you sound more sane and respectable than most people without any disability at all. Considering you're an epileptic and a bipolar at that. At my work alone, a lot of them so called smart and genius surgeons, struggles showing sign of humanity in the way they treat their colleagues and subordinates.....just sad
ReplyDelete